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Very Like a Whale
== "Very Like a Whale" by Ogden Nash ==
by Ogden Nash
 
 
One thing that literature would be greatly the better for
One thing that literature would be greatly the better for


Would be a more restricted employment by the authors of simile and  
Would be a more restricted employment by the authors of simile and metaphor.


Authors of all races, be they Greeks, Romans, Teutons or Celts,
Authors of all races, be they Greeks, Romans, Teutons or Celts,


Can't seem just to say that anything is the thing it is but have  
Can't seem just to say that anything is the thing it is but have to


go out of their way to say that it is like something  
go out of their way to say that it is like something  


What does it mean when we are told
What does it mean when we are told


That that Assyrian came down like a wolf on the  
That that Assyrian came down like a wolf on the fold? 


In the first place, George Gordon Byron had enough experience
In the first place, George Gordon Byron had enough experience
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We'll let it pass as one Assyrian for the sake of brevity.
We'll let it pass as one Assyrian for the sake of brevity.




Line 38: Line 35:


Did he run on all fours and did he have a hairy tail and a big red mouth and big white teeth and did he say Woof Woof?
Did he run on all fours and did he have a hairy tail and a big red mouth and big white teeth and did he say Woof Woof?
 
Frankly I think it is very unlikely, and all you were entitled to say, at the very most,


Frankly I think it is very unlikely, and all you were entitled to say, at the very most,
Frankly I think it is very unlikely, and all you were entitled to say, at the very most,
Line 46: Line 43:
But that wasn't fancy enough for Lord Byron, oh dear me no, he had to invent a lot of figures of speech and then interpolate them,
But that wasn't fancy enough for Lord Byron, oh dear me no, he had to invent a lot of figures of speech and then interpolate them,


With the result that whenever you mention Old Testament soldiers to people they say Oh yes, they're the ones that a lot of wolves dressed up in  
With the result that whenever you mention Old Testament soldiers to people they say Oh yes, they're the ones that a lot of wolves dressed up in gold and purple ate them.
gold and purple ate them.
 


That's the kind of thing that's being done all the time by poets, from Homer to Tennyson;
That's the kind of thing that's being done all the time by poets, from Homer to Tennyson;
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And after that maybe you'll begin to comprehend dimly
And after that maybe you'll begin to comprehend dimly


What I mean by too much metaphor and simile.  
What I mean by too much metaphor and simile.
 
 
== See Also ==
* [[Byron: The Destruction of Sennacherib]]


== "The Destruction of Sennacherib" by Lord Byron ==
''The Assyrian came down like the wolf on the fold,''
''And his cohorts were gleaming in purple and gold;''
''And the sheen of their spears was like stars on the sea,''
''When the blue wave rolls nightly on deep Galilee.''
see [[Byron: The Destruction of Sennacherib]]
[[Category: Ogden Nash]]
[[Category: Ogden Nash]]
[[Category: Literature]]

Latest revision as of 17:21, 23 January 2023

"Very Like a Whale" by Ogden Nash[edit | edit source]

One thing that literature would be greatly the better for

Would be a more restricted employment by the authors of simile and metaphor.

Authors of all races, be they Greeks, Romans, Teutons or Celts,

Can't seem just to say that anything is the thing it is but have to

go out of their way to say that it is like something

What does it mean when we are told

That that Assyrian came down like a wolf on the fold?

In the first place, George Gordon Byron had enough experience

To know that it probably wasn't just one Assyrian, it was a lot of Assyrians.

However, as too many arguments are apt to induce apoplexy thus hinder longevity.

We'll let it pass as one Assyrian for the sake of brevity.


Now then, this particular Assyrian, the one whose cohorts were gleaming in purple and gold,

Just what does the poet mean when he says he came down like a wolf on the fold?

In heaven and earth more than is dreamed of in our philosophy there are great many things.

But I don't imagine that among them there is a wolf with purple and gold cohorts or purple and gold anythings.

No, no, Lord Byron, before I'll believe that this Assyrian was actually like a wolf I must have some kind of proof;

Did he run on all fours and did he have a hairy tail and a big red mouth and big white teeth and did he say Woof Woof? Frankly I think it is very unlikely, and all you were entitled to say, at the very most,

Frankly I think it is very unlikely, and all you were entitled to say, at the very most,

Was that the Assyrian cohorts came down like a lot of Assyrian cohorts about to destroy the Hebrew host.

But that wasn't fancy enough for Lord Byron, oh dear me no, he had to invent a lot of figures of speech and then interpolate them,

With the result that whenever you mention Old Testament soldiers to people they say Oh yes, they're the ones that a lot of wolves dressed up in gold and purple ate them.

That's the kind of thing that's being done all the time by poets, from Homer to Tennyson;

They're always comparing ladies to lilies and veal to venison,

And they always say things like that the snow is a white blanket after a winter storm.

Oh it is, is it, all right then, you sleep under a six-inch blanket of snow and I'll sleep under a half-inch blanket of unpoetical blanket material and we'll see which one keeps warm,

And after that maybe you'll begin to comprehend dimly

What I mean by too much metaphor and simile.

"The Destruction of Sennacherib" by Lord Byron[edit | edit source]

The Assyrian came down like the wolf on the fold, 
And his cohorts were gleaming in purple and gold; 
And the sheen of their spears was like stars on the sea,
When the blue wave rolls nightly on deep Galilee.

see Byron: The Destruction of Sennacherib